


Hello, World

by boybandofhunters



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: M/M, POV Outsider, Soulmates, do people still reads ziam??, hmm, idek, im trying here okay, more like the soul's POV
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-29
Updated: 2015-04-29
Packaged: 2018-03-26 08:20:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,031
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3843820
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/boybandofhunters/pseuds/boybandofhunters
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The fic where the soul narrates their lives, and Zayn and Liam are soulmates. (well, Louis and Harry's too)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hello, World

**Author's Note:**

> this has been in my drafts for a looooonnnnggg time and truly i think if i wait for more dramas in the fandom it will cost me another few years, so heare ya go. i tried so hard and gets so farrrr, in the end, this is the results. oh how i suck dicks at summary. anyway, enjoy.  
> Kudos and comments appreciated.  
> say hi to me at domzaynmalik.tumblr.com

**_“Two souls are sometimes created together and in love before they’re born.”_ **

**_—F. Scott Fitzgerald,_ **

 

Too young.

The soul could feel it.

Every vein that it could seep into feels so fresh, newfangled and untainted. Tangled and connected veins sparking beauty inside the body of this infant.   

It’s like seeing the bud of a flower or the seedlings of trees. So green and young. So pure and chaotic. So life changing.

 A human boy. This time around. One of the most complex creature, humans are. Something of exquisite emotions and endless muscle abilities potential.

The soul knows it would mostly be wasted, but the start always is interesting.

Human have celestial limitation though. Something they call ‘time’. Maybe that is how it knows how young this body is. And how, the burden of phases seemed to affect its being to a closer proximity.  

It burns and it’s distracting, time is. The slow drag of it, the fast on going pace that are immeasurable by heartbeat but by of the ticking of a needle on a machine. oh how long has the soul ever felt this way again. Even this tiny young body could feel it.   

Already it yearns for the other half.

============

 **_“I recognized you instantly. All of our lives flashed through my mind in a split second. I felt a pull so strongly towards you that I almost couldn't stop it.” ―_ ** **_J. Sterling_ **

 Still too young.

 _Was_ when they met for the first time, again.

Mere coincidence, later they would tell _. “Met at the McDonald’s”_. But the soul knows it’s only the playful work of fate and it’s flirting with coincidence.

 A silent ‘ _I’m here_ ,’ that only they could hear, a fictional wavelength that the soul never thought of asking or imply or even think of where it came from but always use.

The body of the soul,  Zain Malik, a beautiful specimen of its species, but not quite reached its full maturity, turned around, just as if the body is already in tune with the soul, the familiar echoes of ringing that the soul has waited since the body was a wee lad felt so close, and-

 _‘There you are_.’

As Zain looked at the person who tapped the shoulder, the boy with brown warm eyes, flustered and stammered something about loose shoe lace, the soul saw it.

 _‘You are a boy’._ The soul heard, felt, tasted, the word from its other half, and if it has the breath like the body has, it would’ve sighed.

Longingly, relieved and calmly.

 But it doesn’t. The only indication of its feeling was the heart, the organ of the anatomy that it has close relation to; the one it has a direct link to, had fasten its beating pace, while the mind sang poetry about the eyes, lips, nose, thumbs of the boy in front of it.

 _You are a boy too, my half.’_ The soul greeted. As the heartbeats thumped loudly between the two bodies, unimportant words stuttered, as batted eyelashes exchanged and already the soul agrees with the mind, how that is the most exquisite shade of brown for eyes the other body has, how it could get addicted to that abashed giggles as Zain cracks a small smile, thanking the other body.

‘I’m Liam. Liam Payne.’ The body introduced itself. _Liam_. It suits the body’s face structures and the way he brings himself. Somewhat self-conscious but still want to offer the world so much of itself.  

_‘Interesting, isn’t it?’_

_‘Yes. We meet at such young age, dearest.’_

“Zain. Malik.” the body greets. Confused at the fastening beat of the heart, yet intrigued by it.

_‘And we are of both the same gender, o’ my most affection.’_

_‘Yes. Yes we are. Why? Are you afraid, my love?’_ The soul asked. Still afraid of the answer after thousands of years together, hundreds of journeys ventured.

 _‘As long as we are together, I will never.’_ Its other half assures. Knowing full well of its weakness and never once disappointed by it.

Zain ties his prompted shoelace as Liam watches. And after, unlike always, instead of turning be on his way with a brief “ Cheers, mate,” Zain turns around and flashes his most charming smiles. Lips bitten halfway, eyelashes flutters ever so softly, he says,

“Goodbye Liam, and thanks, I guess.” The body spoke. An end of conversation but with residual giddy feeling that the soul rarely associates when the body is interacting with another person.

“Yes. I mean, goodbye to you too. Zain.” Liam speaks.

‘ _We’ll of course meet again, fondness of mine_.’ Its half says.

And never in its countless lifetimes it doesn’t trust its other half’s word.

 ==================

 **_“I didn't just love him…I needed him. Not in some desperate "you complete me" sort of way. No, he didn’t make me whole. He improved me. Something about him—something I didn't understand—had a way of amplifying the good in my nature while muting the bad. He was a catalyst for my soul. I didn't need him in order to exist...I needed him in order to be a better_ ** _**me** _ **_.”_ ** **_  
―_ ** **_Angela N. Blount_ **

 

A band. Boyband, to be specific.

They were grouped into it. Reluctance flooded their young minds, ego shaken but too inexperienced and too hungry for confirmation or recognisation of their talents that they took the chance.

 Grouped into with another soulmates pairing of thousands years old. So old that it was easy of the bodies they occupied to get used to one another’s presences.

Coincidence cackles at this turn of event while fate joins in.

Still too young too, the body of the souls they inhabited. And another soul that still searches, inside a body of sunshine reincarnated, but it’s so used to finding its other half on the span of longer times, so it is just a very calm presence in an exuberant body.

Louis and Harry. Niall. And most importantly, Liam is roped into this too.

Liam, whose actually a ‘control freak’, as the boy (“ _Tomlinson, Louis Tomlinson_ ,” the body has mock greeted, while its soul mate, “ _I’m Harry, just Harry_ ”, tried not to fond over the bad impersonation of a spy movie the body never really get fond of) would say.

But Zain would softly defend Liam, while trying to create a bond with this Louis lad, saying “he just wanna do his best like, chill, bro” while he watched Liam repeating the chorus of Kids in America, too shallow breathing, and only moderate air capacity around the throat, and not enough in the diaphragm, he kept getting the pitch wrong.

Zain helped him, putting a hand on Liam’s back – the electricity that every fibres made when the souls connected, crackling, made to be ignore by these young bodies, but they shivered involuntarily of course, they always do - and together their voices harmonized, like they are meant to. Like always.

Niall’s clapping sounds like the start of something, like the first dominos in an articulated design falling, and when Zain and Liam held their gaze, something of shock, surprise, and amusement shadowing their eyes, the souls - still connected by the touch on the back of Liam’s back, Zayn’s hand, so softly tracing lingering circles because he can, even though he doesn’t know why – let themselves believe this is something great happening.

=====

 The body now calls himself Zayn Malik.

Practically nothing changes in the pronunciation.

But Zayn Malik is now a star.

Not like the stars in the universes that the soul have once becomes, the one where it can always be together with its half. Not like the burden of all the atoms, hydrogen, sulphur, halogen, noble gases and other unworldly wonders to stay afloat for other creatures of lesser dimension to gaze and wishes upon it.

This word, a star, is just a synonym of something called celebrity.

Then again, Zayn does get gazed and made wishes upon. So maybe the word is not that farfetched.

Something about being celebrity doesn’t sit well with the souls, never once experienced the life of it and when the ‘higher ups’ and ‘business deals’ are signed, by these naïvely young, (so young to make such big decisions, the souls agreed together) for this band with silly name to make it big, the souls try so hard to remember that the bodies know what they are doing.

Have asked the mind whether they are analytically sure, consulted the hearts whether it’s the right way, and both have given their reluctant consents so the souls should too.

But maybe the soul isn’t that convinced, and the body feels it, so it seeks for its other half, Zayn grabbing Liam’s hand as the deals are signed, apprehension sits tight on his features, - _words, words, words, signature here please, words, words, words, sign here and the deal is done boys_ \- and maybe Liam isn’t as oblivious to the present of his soul’s trembles, because he squeezed back the hand that holds him, a reassuring smile etched on his face, just for Zayn, because assurance for Zayn is much more important than to his loud beating heart.

There was the clash of ideas right from the start. The management wanted to milk any profit they can while ‘One Direction’ is still relevant, while the boys were too naïve to think that they can at least have a little say on the music they produce.

Never say the company doesn’t know how to convince these youngsters to think that they worth less than they could and it’s a charity that they were even considered. Never say that the incredulous look the agents given when Harry and Louis even insinuate that maybe they want to be truthful of who and what they are together, didn’t shatter the young boys hearts and made their souls clung to each other so tight, it took them a few weeks to accept the hurtful facts.

Zayn watched the interaction with empathy while Liam with sympathy. They felt the gurgling of something like hopelessness and wrongwrongwrong that they haven’t yet can pinpoint to anything, but the soul could feel how Liam trembled much more while Zayn went and console the pair whom were too shaken to even know where they were supposed to go.

“You’ll get the chance, Lou,”  

“It’s Harry I’m worried about, mate.

 _‘At least we still have each other, my life’_ its other half reassures.

 _‘Let’s just hope this go for the best, my duniya’_ the soul presses.

_‘Yes. Let’s.’_

=====

 They kissed.

And it was perfect like always when they were inhabiting human bodies, a little dirty, Liam pinning Zayn down with a harsh thump as they mock wrestled, Zayn letting out an explicit groan that could be misinterpreted and Liam stills.

They were wrestling for something stupid, a remote or a sentence of word struck too deep but tension has been excruciatingly thick that day. Maybe because Liam has been half naked almost the whole day of their wardrobe testing and Zayn could not help but to glide his gaze on Liam’s toned body or maybe Zayn has been licking his plump lips far too often for Liam to not want to taste the spit slicked lips.

And they are young boys, so they fight to burn off the flutter in their stomachs, the something that they don’t want to name it yet.

Because they are young. And they are boys.

Liam for once taking in the surrounding, and Zayn was so ready, spread under him licking his lips again, and he have ever been, ever since the first time Liam tapped his shoulder and told him about his shoelaces untied, and he’s waiting, with flushed cheeks, hooded eyes that are looking at Liam’s lovely lips, twitching hands on Liam’s chest, and Liam is even worse, mirroring Zayn’s lick of his lips, his eyes couldn’t stop looking, watching Zayn’s inviting mouth, swallowing for his suddenly dry throat, and the souls know this is it.

Liam lunges, ignoring his rational mind, saying this is bad idea, heartbeat thumping so loud the souls embarrassed at the desperation.

And Zayn meet him halfway, teeth clashing, nose bumping. It was filthy and rushed but when Liam gingerly lick Zayn’s lips and Zayn parted his mouth with a soft gasp, and their tongues met, it became perfect.

Zayn sucking on Liam’s tongue as Liam rut on top of him, Liam exploring Zayn’s mouth, tasting the coffee and Cheetos he just had, until all he could taste is himself, and all the time Zayn letting him, had even angled their heads better, and gripping on Liam’s jeans tightly as the jolt of pleasure and pain courses through their body when their groins collides from the rough materials, soft whimpers escapes from his mouth, and that was it.

Liam breaks the kiss, with the disappointment of the souls could be heard from each other’s mouths, but it was only for him to shuck his jeans, his boxers, and Zayn follow suits with no time to waste because he already missed the taste of Liam’s mouth and he doesn’t want that.

Liam held Zayn’s hips, giving an impressive once over on Zayn’s half naked, flushed body, and Zayn is too far gone that he just pulls Liam in, hissing as Liam touches his cock, aligning theirs perfectly and Zayn unconsciously bucks to the touch.  He hungrily sucks on Liam’s jaw, earlobe, mouth as Liam pant and tries to find the rhythm.

The kiss turns to something urgent, and the feelings could also be because of the echoes of happiness from the souls, knowing they haven’t fully become one again, but almost, and when Liam starts to fasten his hand’s pace, Zayn is already so close, abandoning Liam’s mouth to seek for breath as he pants loudly,

“I’m coming, Li. Babe, I’m coming” he warns, sentences slowly spoken to the shell of Liam’s ear, bringing shivers to Liam’s whole body.

And Liam could only nods and fastens his pace, face so flushed from exertion and Zayn’s voice affecting his body.

They come almost simultaneously, Zayn bucking for the last time before he shoots on his stomach; his shirt has ridden up almost to his chest while Liam follows suit, biting Zayn’s shoulder to hide the moan of ecstasy coursing through his every veins. His comes mingling with Zayn’s making a mess of it on Zayn’s body.

 The soul thought that this mating process is still too barbaric and animalistic, but when both bodies stammers and blushed beautifully, avoiding each other’s gaze but their bodies still entwined, it thinks this may be alright after all.

 ===

Danielle Peazer.

A girl who danced her way to Liam’s heart. She’s fun, witty and quirky at best and broody and snappy at worst, and the soul could feel the body’s heart shattered a little whenever Liam directed his lips towards the red of hers.

Because “I’m not gay,” and “we can’t do this, Zayn, this could ruin everything,” that was laced with desperation and fear was supposed to be enough excuses. But it was the “Truthfully, ‘m scared, Zayn” that softened the blow.

 It hurt the souls because the girl could easily be Zayn if he was born in another universe. If only the genetic constructions and structures was altered a little bit.

Brown eyes, curly black wild hair, skin not of the milky white that of norms around them, laughter that could lift every spirit in the room.

He could have been her. If only the chromosome of X was doubled instead of being replaced by a Y. Because even after how many years have the world progress when it started to be inhabited by humans, it will always be considered of norms for opposite sex to attract and other attractions are abomination.

The soul knows and resents this.

Its other half whimpered with sympathy, and the soul couldn’t bear it, because it already just remembered how peacefulelectricwonderful it was to have its half in its arm, so when there’s another body, another soul in the mix, it threw everything off the carefully balanced topsy-turvy of their lives.

And Zayn –

Oh how weak was Zayn’s mind and heart - even if the soul had remains passive in this encounter, had to, because a silent agreement had struck between it and the one power that gives life to the soul _, to never be involve in the game of hearts_ – as he had remained hoping, just for the smiles, laughter, nuzzles, tears, touches and glances from one taken Liam Payne would spare his way whenever the girl wasn’t around.      

Long days of brooding and being a nuisance to his bandmates, as any normal dejected teenage human, left the soul feels too much emptiness in its presence.

But the show must go on.

Right?

Except it hurt too much when Liam didn’t even think of explaining that she’s coming to one of their shows. And Zayn had to hear it from a reluctant Louis. Too much hand gestures and wild flailing of arms, but it’s the “I’m pissed that he didn’t tell you this…” that left the bitter and too dry taste on the mouth.

A few moments after, Zayn went to his trailer leaving one corner of the wall in the studio decorated with designs shaped of bloodied fist prints.  

He refused dinner and cried like any brokenhearted teenager would, as the soul mourned at the crack visible on the scarred heart.

But the show must _still_ go on.

Bandaged hand and after a stern reprimand from Paul, “Don’t fuck with your health, boy” that was laced with eyes of so much care and sympathy that made Zayn wants to punch more walls, the show goes on as usual.

“…that was the most dumbest and romantic-est act I’ve ever seen, you know,” Louis exclaimed as Zayn collapsed from exertion of hearing the same noise of excitement and hormonal teenage shouting thrown at their direction.

And she had been there, all languid smooth curves dancing to the beat, and Zayn had never felt so repulse of their own songs nor had it ever felt like it was such a chore to sing every lines and hitting every high notes that night. Agony that he could not be happy for the person he loves.

Of course the soul had felt the connection when Liam sung his heart out that one last line of the cheesy love song. Had felt when its other half trying to reach out and telling it _, ‘He’s in contemplation state, schatzi. A mess of feelings that an eighteen year old of human age could only understand. Give him time’_ that only gave the confirmation it didn’t exactly need.

 _‘It is not only him that needs time, my adoration’_ it soothed. _‘This boy also is learning of heart matter himself. And it is never a smooth ride, isn’t it?’_

_‘No. it never was.’_

“What was?” Zayn asked as he sloppily tangled his feet with the older lad’s, and slumped his face on the couch, ready to be unconscious and be rid of the pricking of headaches and the dull, throbbing pain on his fist.

“Liam” Louis replied, so easily, challenging eyes ready when Zayn glared straight at him. “He sang to you the ‘cause I can love you more than this’ line, when you were having a proper strop just now. Pretty romantic gesture there, mate. Coulda easily be directed to her.”

Zayn tensed.

Before he could reply anything other than curses towards Louis, there’s a knock on the door of the trailer that was so alien to them- as they had long since accept that personal boundaries are a thing of a past to this band - they both snapped their head to that direction.

“I need to talk to Zayn.” Was the timid answer to a question they need not to ask.

Zayn groaned.

The soul pleaded.

The heart accomplice with it, softening to pulp because even if it had been hurt countless of time, it knew it is for the best they talk it out.

Louis practically picked Zayn up and threw him bodily to Liam’s direction. Before Zayn could even grunt his surprise.

Liam who caught him with gentleness that contrasts greatly with his strong grip on Zayn’s waist. Like he had any right to be so physically compatible to Zayn’s need right that moment.

 Zayn who disentangled himself from the suffocating gentle grasp and the loud heartbeat of a young Liam Payne, lit up the crumpled cigarettes in his jeans and took a shuddering breath of the nicotine filled air to calm himself down.

Breathe in. and out. Repeat.

The soul could hear the question of “What more he could possibly destroy?” and it understood, it could feel the burden, but it placated the heart, as to let the beat a relaxing rate as its other half did the same to Liam’s staccato heartbeat.

The thoughts of “Liam shouldn’t have. Only making it worst. Giving him hopes that are never going to be filled” became a constant chant in Zayn’s brain and the chilling dejected “He could push Liam away, but who’s stronger, really?” rang terrible to the soul’s being.  

And Liam -

Liam had looked much more a wreck. Distressed to his very core. But there’s a subtle calm ambiance in his manner, something that the soul could almost pinpoint - 

 _‘He’s realizing who’s more important’_ its other half whispered, the vibration of its giddiness making Liam stuttered and jittery.

_‘Took him awhile’_

_‘Hush you, he’s still eighteen of world’s age.’_ Gone has the pitying sighs replaced by almost giggling with anticipation, happiness.

And the soul could see the glow of the happiness like an orb right at the centre of its half. Right to every fibres of Liam’s being. It’s always so beautiful. The bodies quarreled and their fights intensify, then confessed, strings of synonyms of the word ‘I love you, and I can’t bear a life without you’ –because they are still so young, they strayed from the words but the essence is there.

When Liam’s heartfelt sorry is the dam that makes the words “I _love_ you, Liam” filters out of the boy’s mouth, so much different from all the “I love yous” they had shared, the soul coos, and when it is met with “I- I do love you too, Zayn.”, it other half simpers in.  

It was supposed to be that simple, isn’t it?

They confess their feelings, and the souls bond should make them unbreakable, but a deal is a deal, and they have five years of duration to play this charade of happy lives with the missus. There is still the contract.

Even after the confession from Liam’s part to Danielle, “I guess I have always loved Zayn more”, with Zayn’s sweaty hand clasping his and their loud beating heartbeats overthrowing every single white noises surrounding them, the soul’s other half pleading _‘make her forgive him easily, please, companion of mine’_ to the girl’s soul, a once inhabitant of a goddess body, the girl only gently pat Liam’s cheek followed by a warm hug with an undertone of _‘she has always known he wasn’t the one, my friend’_ from the soul of the girl, there is still the contract.

The contract still binds them.  And they still have no control to it, so it really almost means nothing even when Danielle took Zayn’s hand and the “Take care of him” leaving Zayn with a lump in his throat.

Almost, of course.

============

“Shaved me hair off,” Liam said, while Zayn, full of wonder and excitement runs his hand on Liam’s spiky shaven head.

 _‘He wants it to mean as a start of something, Thy’la.’_ Its other half greets.

Zayn pecks a small unsure kiss, off-centered to Liam’s lips. Eyes glinting to hide the almost fallen drop of tear.

 _‘He gets it, habibati.’_ It says when Liam presses a deeper kiss, just simple touch of lips with lips, more than enough for the souls to feel complete, once again whole.

Zayn run his hand on Liam’s head when Liam deepens the kiss, and the soul could feel it, the salty taste of the tears, the bubbly feelings of happiness, it could even feel the promises and maybe after being alive for more than thousands of years it still have its naivety in it because it trust them all.

Trust the unspoken promises made by twenty something year old boys, when they were drunk of their peak of success. When they shouldn’t be making any at this time.

“Want it to mean as a start of something. For us.” Liam’s calming voice was whispered even though they were the only one there.

“Yeah?” Zayn’s eyes still glisten but there’s the smile that could bring brightness of sun to shame. “I’d like that”.

If only everything is that easy.      

 ==========

Danielle Peazer,again. For Liam Payne.

“It’s only temporary, love. We need the boost for album promotion. What’s better than two people getting back together.” A petite woman told them, someone from public act of relationships stunts. She’s confident when she says “Give them hope that a relationship could have second chance,” as if it doesn’t shatters both of the boys hearts for something of simplicity.

 _‘Hope’_ the soul felt the heaviness of the word.

“Hope” Zayn mimicked. Even when he’s holding Liam’s hand like he could not lose him again.

 “Let’s hope it is for the last time alright?” a kiss on the cheek and on the knuckles of their entwined hand by one cheesy Liam Payne.

At least it gets a smile out of Zayn’s tight line of lips.

Hope was the only word Zayn clung onto whenever Liam grasp Danielle’s hand in public to show the implied notion that they were again trying to execute the relationship given  but  it’s also the only word that came into his mind when Liam’s eyes caught his when he entwine their hands neatly during their private times, no pressure needed. Just them.

When the Payzer contract deal is lifted, even though the sneaky management did try to slot in an engagement out of the deal only been thwarted by Liam’s uncommon denies for ‘the best for the band’. He was adamant to not be in a relationship that he wasn’t interested in much longer and the support from Danielle’s managers managed to make them back off.

 Zayn didn’t leave his house for a whole solid day after the news was publicly told. And unsurprisingly, Liam was also nowhere to be found.

A blonde Perrie Edwards. For Zayn Malik.

At first it was as always, a promotion. And she had been one of the people Zayn felt comfortable with. So it never really was a chore.

Kissing her was easy because Liam would always get possessive at the end of the day and his rough stubbles take away all Zayn inhibitions and it is fun. Liam would mark Zayn’s body with bite marks and bruised hips from fucking to remind him who belongs to whom. Fucking Zayn’s mouth after the paparazzi took enough picture of the ‘Perrie’s birthday celebration’.

Zayn letting him be rougher because he wants to remember.

Liam taking care of a trembling Zayn after a too much and too fast stimulation because he wants to feel like they are something more than secret lovers.

Zayn’s calm acceptance and his soft butterfly kisses every night before they go to bed would soothe the need. Usually.

“An engagement would be suited to throw off the curious glance they got on you Zayn.”

“Plus, we need a shiny brand new news for your up and coming movie.”

Deviously they forced the idea towards Zayn and Perrie. Knowing full well both are handled by the same company and no other meddling agents could impede the deal.

The deal was signed before Zayn could even think properly.

The deal was signed before Liam could offer himself to take the affliction. After so many times he had refused to do it with Danielle.

Even though they both knew that would only spell disaster.

Because Zayn may wears his heart on his sleeves but Liam had already given his to Zayn’s waiting hand the first night the spent tangled in each other’s presence.

First time the soul was so scared, it almost sent the body to unconscious state, but shock made it alert.

Only anchor was its other half, urging it to be stronger, while Liam’s hand and mouth didn’t stop comforting and encouraging Zayn while his heart experienced the first jab of broken parts.

It was too sudden and Liam never got the chance to adapt.

So everytime the taboo word rises, he tensed up. Novice of the control of his own body, an introvert who managed a life of trying to become an extrovert, he failed to hide his own thought as the word “…engaged” laced every interviews they manage to slot in between the frenetic plans of being a member of One Direction.

He only knows that the video compilation of him shaking his heads to the engagement issues brought them to even tighter schedules and even lesser private time and more headaches courtesy of flashes of high definition cameras flashing his way.

==========

One Sophia Smith. For Liam Payne.

An ambitious businesswoman with negotiable heart. An expensive friend to talk to during the long hours of flights while Zayn would seethe with anger and jealousy in their designated hotel room.

The angry sex sometimes helped.

To release all the pent up anger. Liam with his jealousy of the ring that was supposed to be his to show off to and Zayn with his want to be the one presence beside Liam’s in any paparazzi photos.

They always make up after, though. Never want to waste more time fighting like Louis and Harry would whenever Harry would sporadically snap at all the bullshit they have to handle.

Sometimes one of them would hold the other while they cry of exhaustion and frustration.

Tired they are. And really, the souls understand everything completely, tried to soothe the bodies to accommodate the burgeoning feelings, but yes, they are tired.

============

 **_What if you find your soul mate... at the wrong time?”_ **  
**_― Lauren Kate, Passion_ **

 “Ever thought we may have found each other at the wrong time?”

Zayn’s question lingered, while the two bodies intertwined on the spread of white in their hotel room,  Liam’s hand automatically wrapped tighter around Zayn’s, heavy answers at the tip of his tongue, ready to lie.

The soul have heard this question before, asked in different voices at different background of times, but always with the same trepidation and exhaustion spiking every single syllables.

“No, my love. Never ask such absurd questions ever again.” Was the answer of one soldier to his wife, when she asked, the last night they held each other before the train came. The last night the soul got to feel its other half warm and comforting presence.

“Saukerl, wake up” A young girl kissing her best friend’s cold dry lips, too young and too broken to be fixed. The soul knew its other half was already gone that time, only waiting for the owner of the body, a tiny girl, to understand.

 “No. because then this will be too real, my soul.” The story of two gods separated and when they miss each other so much the world rains.

Liam, he opted to answer the truth. The one that is always in his mind.

“Maybe. But we’re not the one who controls time and fate, are we?”

 _“He said what all of our lives before are too scared to say,”_ the soul confesses, surprised at the possibility.

Frankly Zayn felt crushed and hopeless, almost disentangling the bodies for a moment of nicotine air and other poisonous ingredients to numb the words. In fact, he itches for it.

 “But.” Liam continues. “I would like to think we defy all of them, an exception of fated mistakes.” Fancy words to take out the blow. His smiles that hides his eyes in his cheeks are the only reason Zayn didn’t up and leave him.

 The room was silent and suddenly so cold when Zayn emphasizes, “You think this is a mistake.” A statement. Not a question.

“One that I’ll make every single opportunities presented.” Easy words because the truth are always so light.

A surprised huff of laughter, and a “sentimental fucker,” blurted out of Zayn’s smiling mouth.

“They say you are what you eat, bro” as a retaliation. Returning to the smile that make Zayn feel like he owns the world with these surging power of loves toward the man laying besides him.

The thud of rolling body down the bed and the accompanied ringing laughter brightened up the souls happiness.

_“He makes it easy,doesn’t he?”_

The thrilling tone of the soul’s other half made it yearn for it more, and Liam sometimes as in tune he is to his soul like Zayn has the knack to, reached out for his lover, so that the souls could once again reunited, through every part of their bodies that are touching.

The leftover giggles and crinkled eyes are just a bonus for them all.

=============

**_“My sister told me a soul mate is not the person who makes you the happiest but the one who makes you feel the most, who conducts your heart to bang the loudest, who can drag you giggling with forgiveness from the cellar they locked you in. It has always been you.”-Sierra Demulder, Love, Forgive Me_ **

They give way to Harry and Louis first, because they understand. Those two had yearned so badly they almost cost all their money to rebel.

Besides, they can wait. Harry and Louis, they tried but they can’t.

When the first picture of hand holding of the two boyband members makes the news, shit hits the fan. And oh the soul can see how ready the other couple is. how their souls are practically touching, supporting each other while Harry and Louis gets bombarded with less than polite questions about their relationship.

But Harry, with all his for-the-first-time-in-forever-genuine smiles and luscious hair flipping, doesn’t care. And Louis with his snarky comments and quick wits doesn’t either. They are too happy telling the world something they had kept for a long time, and when it’s their time, they don’t want to waste any time thinking about the negative connotations the interviews or prints said. They are finally able to show their selves.

Louis did confessed, to Zayn, in the middle of the night in their bus, how he was actually scared shitless. How he thinks maybe Harry or worse, him, would succumb under the pressure.

“But you see, Zayny, I don’t fucking care anymore,like shit, man, I get to kiss Harold and the only people who’s going to be shocked are the homophobes. And honestly, fuck the homophobes.” He explains, taking a drag of his smokes before continuing, “You will know how it feels when you do, you know?”

His blue eyes are the only thing that Zayn remembers when he recalls the memory. Those two blue orbs and his words.

“Yeah, maybe. One day.” A drag of the nicotine filled air.

“Yeah? One day, mate.”

The silence fills the air. Only to be interrupted by Liam entering the bus, opting for Zayn’s shoulder to rest after some business jargons he had to deal with. And like he understands, he entwines his and Zayn fingers neatly.  
he kicks Louis’ chair lazily “Lover boy, Harold’s looking for you.”

And the two lads hears the sound of Louis trundling out of the bus, muttering fondly “Lazy arse,” and “Have fun, lovers” towards them.

 _“Hello, you”_ the soul greets and Zayn repeats the word, out loud.

“ _Hello, world”_ Its other half replies, while Liam smiles until they both fall asleep on the sofa, hands entwining, a promise made.

“Maybe, one day, yeah?” Liam calls out, in the swirl of the cigarette smokes and the dark interior of the bus and the sleepy mind.

“Hmm. Maybe” Zayn agrees, while he tightens the clasp of the hands and closes his eyes. Hoping. Because what else can they do.

 


End file.
